Moms: Stop Using Your Kids

I am a mother of 2. I've dated men with kids before and some of them have good parenting relationships with the mothers of their children. Then you have a lot of men who do not. I am strongly against dating men who do not take care of their children. That being said, I hate it when mothers use their kids to control the father or just simply will not let the willing father see their kids. The crazy thing is; the reason usually has to do with the fact that the guy broke up with them and/or has moved on.

Though this can be a painful time (the initial break-up) a woman has to think about her children and not herself. Yes, there should be boundaries when he is dating like who your kids can be around but the same needs to go for the mother as well. Anyone that comes in contact with your children needs to be able to respect them and treat them kindly. Anything else is not acceptable.


I just hate to see so many selfish minded women out there that disregards the feelings of their children just so they can hurt a father the only way they can. Once a man gets to the point where mentally he has moved on from a woman, he doesn’t care anymore if she dates or is in a relationship. So the woman needs stronger leverage. She begins to disallow the man to see his kids, won't let him talk to them, moves the children out of state, then runs around telling people he is a deadbeat dad; when the truth is she’s a downright trifling mother. Sometimes she’s so cruel that the man gives up on even trying.


If a man decides he does not want to be a father, you cannot make him. You are beating yourself in the head and wasting your energy even trying; but if a man wants to be a loving, caring and supportive father then a woman should let him. Our children need more to become stable teens and adults and with the rate of ignorance these days when it comes to dating they are doomed.

And...It Is What It Is!